[x]

You don't just die.Do you understand?
The blade against your wrist
Doesn't just slice your skin.
It cuts through others
Hearts
Souls
And sanity.

Do you understand?
You don't just kill yourself.
You kill everyone.
Everyone dies
Everyone cries
Everyone suffers
From YOUR goodbyes.

Do you understand?
You don't just die.
You take everyone down
With you.

I wish...I wish I was a monster
So I could be kind
And break the stereotypes.

I wish I was colored
So I could respect people
And break the stereotypes.

I wish I was a man
So I could be kind to women
And break the stereotypes.

I wish I had male friends
So we could all be..
Just friends
And break the stereotypes.

I wish I had autism
So I could prove that autism,
Does NOT mean "dumb".
And I could break the stereotypes.

I wish I could change the world.
But sometimes, you can't break a stereotype.

Only stereotypes, can break you.

Graduation DayGraduation Day:

They told us we would be alright...

We had fought with honour and won our titles.

We had overcome trials together -

Watching dozens of our siblings fall in the line of duty.

For this they had promised us, a wondrous welcome;

A bountiful world of adventure, with a myriad of paths.

All this, they said, awaited us in the stone cities.

Large metropolises, where the working folk resided...

There were hundreds of us, who made that journey.

Walking miles across the scorching desert,

Clinging to a hope of the fortunes beyond.

Yet what awaited us was not a promised land -

Nor was it a life based on the merit we had earned.

Lingerhow can i move forward,
when the fingerprints of my insecurities
are still lingering within my chest,
pressing against my ribs like piano keys?
i am just waiting, for the day,
when the saddest parts of me
are overcome with songs of serenity.

Pretty Blue PillsPretty blue pills,
shiny in my palm,
the ticket to my peace,
to my eternal calm.

They're so perfectly round,
and soon they'll be in me.
The closest to perfect
that I'll ever be.

They go down so smooth.
Five, ten, fifteen and twenty.
Soon I'll be gone.
Twenty-five and Thirty.

That should be enough,
but I'll play it safe.
Thirty-five and forty.
Now I have no more to take.

The bottle is empty,
as empty as I feel.
None of this is happening,
too good to be real.

But soon I start to drift
into a dark unknown fog.
Somewhere quite distantly.
I hear a muffled sob.

But I blow it off as fake.
Nobody could possibly care.
I doubt anyone's noticed
th

PhantomWhen life
or fate
or whatever it is
that puts things together
and takes them apart...
when It
amputated you,
it left me
with a phantom
limb
and you are still attached
to my body
when I dance
and make love
alone

ten ways this breakup isn't meant for the movies1.
you go out for twelve eggs and come back
with half a dozen and a new girlfriend.
you hold the eggs out to me like
six dead birds is enough of a peace offering.

2.
i push the eggs out of your hand and stay
with my hand over your heart as i watch them
fall. if they do not hit the ground, this is all a dream.

3.
the eggs smash on the tile and splatter
on the cherry wood cabinets, newly installed
that cost me two paychecks.

3.
the egg whites hit your leather shoes that
you’ve worn for two months straight
because you think they make you look more sophisticated.

3.
the egg whites hit the fridge halfway up, barely touching
the moose mag

Dear friend,You have to understand, dear
The reason to why I run.
I run away from reality
From the lungs that cannot
Take anymore smoke
From the heart that threatens to
Stop...
I run away because
I'm a coward
Because I'm afraid of life
Afraid to care or love.
I'm afraid that every time
I'm glad it blows up in my face
And that every time I smile
I shed a million more tears.
That's why I run, dear
You have to understand.
I was destined to be a fighter but
I don't want to fight anymore.
I was destined to be a warrior
But how am I supposed to win when
The war I fight is against life itself?
I know that I always blow everything up but-
I keep stepping on mines, dear...
...I keep stepping on mines...

ellipsisshe goes to sleep
clawing at her chest with pinpoint accuracy
for an emptiness she can’t describe,
but hates all the same. tomorrow

she will write a letter: “dear boy,
i always wanted to be somebody’s
flowery poem, but the verses carved in my arms
are riddled with ugly clichés. & you are why

i don’t sleep through the night. if
we were a language, i was the
subordinating conjunction, you were

the punctuation.

i remember you in staccato
conclusions, solemn absences
of goodbye”

TearsI am not afraid to cry.

I am not afraid for you to see the tears

My tears.

Don’t tell me I have no heart.

Don’t tell me I have no soul.

For without them I could not cry.

You may not see my tears but they are there.

I have learned to let myself cry for the things I’ve loved,

For the things I’ve lost.

They are silent tears, but they are mine.

So let me cry.

Let me show you I have a heart.

Let the things that touch my heart be shown through my tears.

I am not afraid to cry.

brain squealsI beat depressions in the earth
for my brain squeals and waves
that burst in my wet ears
until something makes me drown.
I will. (again) V.

Virginia,

put rocks in pockets
and walk right in --
I'll drink your overcoat
until your throat weeps
and your soaked hair
weighs you down.

I promise.

with love,
Ouse.

P.S.
brain squeals are from cold sweats
sleep well.

I am notI’m not your little boy.
You’re not my little girl.
I’m just someone you met,
And wants to change the world
I’m not the prince in your dreams
I don’t have smarts or might
I’m just the one that screams
And cries to sleep at night
I’m not who you want me to be.
I will never be what you are.
I’m myself, I am free.
I’m not ashamed of my scars
I’m not that weak
You’re not that strong
You still have company
But I’m still alone
So I speak
Though this poem.
It’s not a pretty love song
I’m just saying what pains me, explaining what’s going on.
Because I am not perfect,
I’m not retarded,
I’m just like you,
Broken Hearted
Never forget,
There is always a reason to be
And I won’t regret
I’m always happy to be me.

Second ShadowThe hand on your shoulder
The whispers in your mind
The words on your tongue
The voice in your throat
And the feelings in your soul

To drive to madness
To seduce the insane
To draw the blood
And dull the senses
To plague the memories
Of damage done
To fake safe haven
As the character changes

Light the anger and fuel the rage
Another mind to feed
A second shadow
To take you into eternity

Skylapse

Skylapse

And now I finally see-
The true face of faith that I once held so dearly

This sensation is somewhat familiar-
My thick tears become entangled

I clench my trembling fists-
As a regretful prayer exits my tainted lips
-
Blindly lead down this beaten path!
Reaching the end forces me to despise the past

Hymns of comfort have left me feeling torn!
This flawed cross can't protect me anymore

I always reached for what wasn't even there!
The darkness becomes clear as the light disappears

I kiss the welcoming abyss / Closing the rift I once lived
Clouds drift / Body lifts
Winds wisp / Tears twist
My pain and peace quickly shift / The over

combatantI.
it strikes me
that this woman
could be a palace.

I marvel at
the opulent dome of
her brow, her arch
expression—

skin like a courtyard of
ivory tiles,
a thousand intersecting
golden lines about her
head and neck.

she beams from atop her
sunlit tower,
beatific and beautiful,

spreads her arms like
open doors,
invites you to be one of

the many
who have wandered her
lavish halls.

II.
I’ve often thought
of myself
as a castle:

all rough-hewn stone
and turrets,
a temper like molten
tar.

my head is crowned
with
embattled parapets,

weapons readied
at the crenels.

I look out from my
guerites, my brattices,
eyes like arrow-slits

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Paperwork and Paper ClipsPaper clips lined up one by one like paperword in single file
Workers tend to dash as people clash
Same as yesterday and tomorrow

They collect documents as well as money
Leaving unexpected people loathing
While in their pockets quarters jingle and money folds
Nothing changes

They just smirk and listen to what they are told

The boss is the man
The person or people they fear
Some get by as others get rich
Caring not for the people but their own

But the lucky few smile
As the others run in the maze
Money to feed; to settle down,
thats what most of us need

The lab rats listen to those who collect their hours
They go door to door

Loner in the DustBy the window I sit, counting the days
Its been 8 long weeks since you left my side
And I still dont know what to do

You told me you would return but that was many year ago
Well thats how it feels like anyway

I've counted the birds and the clouds
It doesn't change as it used to

And the seasons are blinking away into another rainy night
I told myself it would be easy
I told myself alot of things
But lies escape unsealed lips even with a quiver

Ive been begging the same person to not let go
That person turned into a dream
Than a memory
I kept trying to hang on for reasons unknown

But it drifted through my fingers as if it knew
A

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Submitted: May 23, 2012
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Begotten

by *Shadowlover6, May 23, 2012, 8:56:10 PM
Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

Utterly New

I feel myself weeping one tear after another
My cheeks are stained
My face is warm

I feel the emotions pouring one by one-
Than by the dozen
I feel myself drifting

I become what I have feared for a long time
A loner, a outcast (GOD HELP THE OUTCASTS!!)

Than I am sheep without a shepard
I feel lost

My neck becomes cold
My tears drying from the fan that blows
I hold the card to my chest

Memories-
Memories!

I remember the face of the man
The face of love and he remembers mine
The beloved, the wanted!

Now I am gone, no better, he is gone!
I doubt he'd would remember I?

Me a shadow in the dust formly known has beloved; As Queen...
Its been centuries of years though the time
I am weak; I am strong

I haven't yet to see your face; why would you see mine

A shallow heart of a shell
A begotten hoe

Was I not everything to you, was I not everyone!
No..., I feel myself utterly confused
The tears start (NO! Not again)

The tears flow...
I weep and weep
Becoming a rock with no emotion
I lose, I lose...

I become what I have feared
No I am what I have feared
A loner, a outcast

Youre beloved in memory
In thought and sound
Youre beloved in the shell, flowing,- flowing through

Begottenby *Shadowlover6

Literature / Poetry / Emotional / Free Verse

...

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~bobdapilow May 2, 2013

omg did you make this amazing!!!

*Shadowlover6 May 3, 2013 Hobbyist Writer

Haha of course and I'm glad you like it.

*BlutEisen May 23, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

It's beautiful - the language, the flow, it's beautiful. Such wonderful blank verse.

*Shadowlover6 May 23, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

^^ thank you

*BlutEisen May 23, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

I write poetry too. I stick to rhymed verses. I don't like free-verse that much, mainly because people abuse it and tear it to pieces. But this.........this is wonderful. It's awesome.

*Shadowlover6 May 23, 2012 Hobbyist Writer

i do alot of rhymed ones as well.... its hard for me to write like I just did it just came and as quickly as it came it left me

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